Seriously Folks

Harry 4th of Birthallowinemas Day!

2012-01-03T19:48:00.000-08:00

My husband keep saying "there are no new original thoughts." I am fairly certain he has not peered inside my brain lately, because I can't imagine other people thinking the things I think of.

Harry 4th of Birthallowinemas Day is my original idea.

If someone has thought of it before... I will give you credit.

The Glory of 4th of Birthallowinemas Day is it can be celebrated any day of the year!

Harry is just a combination of Happy and Merry... I thought Harry had a nice ring to it.

So... If you're looking for a card to wish someone a Harry 4th of Birthallowinemas Day... look me up! They come in a range of designs... or better yet, create your own.

No new original thoughts... sheesh!

~January 2, 2012~

2012-01-02T12:57:00.000-08:00

Elated to be alive!

The cold air outside invigorates me... Brisk walking seems necessary.

Working out was painful today... but reminded me why I need to keep moving;

We must never let the pain catch us or it eats us alive.

'Can't catch me...

Smile. Hug. Smooch. Love...

Every Damn Day!

~2012~

2012-01-01T19:06:00.000-08:00

I'm feeling good things for the upcoming year.

I am certain that good things are coming my way.

I will make a positive impact on the world every day...

(-:Even if it just with a smile:-)

No public promises

No looking back and wondering "What if?"

No slighting others because of jealousy

No gossip

Just appreciation for every second of every moment of every day...

Life is Good...

I'm gonna Live It!

Join me in Living!!!

Current Economy = Legal Slavery

2011-10-11T18:00:00.000-07:00

Without getting into political teams, I am attempting to rationally discuss the current economy. Giving you a little background on my middle class peasantry will be depressing, but a common tale, we hear daily on NPR, C-SPAN, Fox News, and all of the other informative places we get our daily news. If you want to get to the meat of my blog you can skip a few paragraphs and not read about the past few years... I give background info because the experiences have brought me to the reality of being lured into legal slavery.

I am a middle management school administrator in the area of special education. I was working for cooperatives in the far southwest metro area of Minneapolis, in counties that were projected to have growth beyond their borders about six years ago. I commuted 60 miles each way on a daily basis when gas was over $4/gallon. My salary was nice... not six digits... but approaching the higher end of the 5 digit salary. My spouse is an educator who is working in a private school, and has a moderate salary with benefits such as always being in town and available for our three children (priceless), allowing our children the private education w/o paying tuition, and belonging to a small school community that we thoroughly loved being a part of.

We purchased our Southern Minnesota 1910's built home in 2001 for well under $200,000, despite the fact that the bank was willing to give us a loan for over $300,000 ~ unfreakingbelievable ~. We had two cars back then, and both were under 10 years old at the time. We were, oh so proud. We now have 3 cars and I am fairly certain all have over 100,000 miles, none were purchased new. We only had two drivers 10 years ago, and now we have 5 (3 under the age of 22 and one male driver age 18)... one can just hear the insurance companies cha-chinging from our bank account.

I couldn't breathe for four years. Through all of it I was only unemployed for 3 months and collected my unemployment checks quite readily. I applied here and there... but there was a lot of movement with other school districts downsizing middle management positions as well. Competition was tough and I started to take it to heart.

The long and short of it... I am now working in a small town, 75 miles from home for $25,000 less than I made 4 years ago. We continue to make our house payments on our house that has depreciated over $30,000. I have an apartment in the town I work in that I pay $400/month, which is about the equivelant that gas would cost if I commuted daily. Time on the road is wasted. I miss my family during the week, but we do what we have to do. Next year we will have 3 kids in college... I hear of people working a few hundred miles away from home and going homes on weekends. That must be exhausting, my heart goes out to them. Single parents have to move where the jobs are, and many companies are paying employees well below the poverty level... because people have to work.

I think that the royalty who handed out the loans, talked about the "trickle down theory", moved jobs to Mexico and over seas for cheaper labor, and sit on their loopholes for the wealthy, have been in cahoots for over a half century and succeeded in creating an economic society comparable to slavery of the south in the not so distant past of the United States. We are owned by the banks, who have been given bountiful bonuses for their "good work" from the tax dollars of us: the working poor... their slaves. Our owners, continue to build bigger and more beautiful banks, that resemble castles with lots of windows and high ceilings, while our homes have depreciated about 20% in the last five or six years. Many of us owe our owners much more than our houses are even worth now; therefore we can't move on, because our losses are far to great and no one will ever give us a loan (nor should they).

What have I learned from all of this? Someone always has it worse off than I do. There are some people who very much need to be royalty and control us peasants. Being a peasant isn't the worst thing that can happen to us. Money does not equal happiness... happiness comes from who you spend time with and whether you make a positive impact on the world. I can handle my life as a peasant, the kings only think about themselves and how they can get more $$$ and power.

Mostly, I learned that history repeats itself... I feel stupid that I was suckered into slavery, and I'd bet that I'm not the only one.

Seriously Folks...

Paranoia

2011-09-02T10:04:00.000-07:00

I crawl through the forest in the dark fog

Proceeding with caution.

For if I upset the balance I will disappear into the darkness

I hear their whispers, cursing, sneering, laughing

I feel their breath on my neck, they thrive on the scent of fear

Their lips touch my skin and they lick the salt from my sweat

I keep moving forward, for what lies behind no longer exists

Stopping means I will be eaten alive

They will follow but will never get what they want

I focus on what lies ahead

All that is left is here and now

Forever

Father forgive me... yet another confession...

2011-08-27T17:16:00.000-07:00

I've never been one to steal. When I was 7 or 8 years old I was accused of stealing bulk candy from Woolworth's in Chippewa Falls, WI and I was mortified. The store manager grabbed my arm and said, "You can go to jail for stealing candy." I told him I didn't steal any... (but he could see in my eyes that I was thinking about it). It's like... OK Seriously Folks, you fill a bin with millions of cinnamon disks and expect kids to just walk by without being tempted? I really hadn't taken any candy!!! Honest... but I wanted to.

In college I may have let some of my wants get the best of me. Occasionally we would end up with a new lighted beer sign, pilsner glass or other household goods in our apartment or condemned houses. Once we even acquired a 2 gallon industrial sized container of Lysol which we used for a couple of years ~ Bad idea to leave the storage room door open when Sara and friends w/sticky fingers were around. The funny thing is, we had to leave it in the parking lot that night, because we didn't drive ourselves to that "club." In the morning when we were out and about IT WAS STILL SITTING OUT IN THE PARKING LOT... we figured that meant it was ours!

So... last week I was in a department store and I was drooling over a skirt that I really really really had to have. I tried a skirt with different print but same cut on the day before, (shopping for boxers for my hubby), and bought the skirt because it is not often that I think, "Hey, I look really good in this." I was in the store exchanging the boxers for my hubby. So I looked on the clearance rack, 60% off and there it was, on the hanger waiting for me... screaming my name. They even had my size. I tried it on... just to be sure, and was sold. Then the money guilt started in with me... "is this a want or a need?" "You just bought one yesterday." Another voice said, "Aw come on, you work so hard!" You deserve it! Then Jimminy Cricket said, "Even if you did steal it, which you won't, you could never wear it because the guilt would kill you!"

I left the fitting room before the devil got the best of me and started to look for a lime green top to match. I found a few perfect matches, as the designers and marketers certainly know what we want. I left all of the tops on the hangar and decided to check out before I did any more damage. The counter in the department I was in was closed so I had to go to the one by the exit. On my way to the exit I silently set the skirt down in the swimsuit section and left the store... ashamed of the thoughts that ran through my mind.

OMG maybe this is the beginning of what Sr. Mary Ida warned me of... I am being possessed by the devil. Is this the early stages of kleptomania? Am I going to spend the last 50 years of my life behind bars? What was I thinking? Do other "typical" working class professionals ever have these thoughts or is it just me? Am I going to burn in hell for this? I was elated by leaving the store with just my hubby's boxers... the whole experience traumatized me.

I gotta go now... the skirt is still on the rack (I checked yesterday) and I am going to head to the store and get myself a skirt... with cash!

Seriously Folks... Keep an eye on me

Sweet Summer Time...

2011-07-06T17:05:00.000-07:00

Is it already July 6th?

Like tomorrow is my dad's birthday, July 7th?

Oh for crying in the beer... my sweet summertime is slipping through my fingers...

Like sands through the hourglass...

We wait all year for this luscious month of July. Many of us are soaking up a week off in the sun (don't be like me and forget your sunscreen). This morning when I woke up I felt completely relaxed. I have no huge projects looming over my head, I am in the midst of 10 days off of work, the weather is simply gorgeous, and I am alive and well. Life is good....

Wait... my phone is buzzing... Ahhh... it's work... apparently I am alone in my time off, I have received several emails today. What should we do with this ______? How do you want to handle _______ budget? If we hire _______ today will we still be within the guidelines of the union? I think back to the days before smart(er than Sara) phones, cell phones, email, and all of the modern technology I am truly addicted to. When my dad went on vacation for 2 weeks he had no contact with his place of employment. Can you imagine?

Seriously? I think now that we have all of these hotels with "free wifi" (oh wait, those are the hotels we stay in, you five star hotelers have to pay a minimum of $10/day AND pay for your breakfast~ I'll never figure that one out), and phones that help you "stay connected" even while you are on vacation, it's time to reevaluate what we are doing to ourselves. On my vacation I should not feel obligated to respond to my boss, parents I work with, or teachers I supervise. Am I wrong in this kind of thinking? Honestly? When I woke up stress free because I was "off" it was my full intent to remain stress free until next Tuesday, the 12th of July. Like my message on my voice mail says, "I am out of the office until July 12, leave a message and I'll return your call when I return." It also says that on my email "out of the office response." So why do the same people keep sending emails?

Note to self... respect every one's time off. Nothing is so important that I need to take some one's downtime away from them by asking questions that can be answered next week... when we're all back in the office... looking forward to next July when we get to take a full week off and soak up enough summer to get us through the upcoming year.

** I do get more than 10 days off but for this 10 I need VACATION**

Seriously Folks... Stay cool!

Will Blog for Stamps

2011-05-15T16:32:00.000-07:00

I tried something new a couple of weeks ago and really liked the final product. I'm kind of into layered cards with little surprises.I bought these little Marcella "folders" for stamping at our local Drug Store in Austin, MN. This store has something for everyone AND was where I found ClearSnap Smooch Spritz (a new addiction of mine). I have had a lot of fun changing the shimmer, color, depth, and texture of my cards.

I started this project with a little shimmer from the spritz... For this project I was using Heritage Glimmer Mist... I did not spritz it on the rug as it may appear in this picture. I currently use a box... I have been using it more and more frequently too. I've been using up some scrapping bundles that I purchased when I first started scrapbooking... you know, one of those things that looks like "such a good deal" until you realize that you'll never use that many stripes, daisies, and foo foo pages. I have discovered with Smooch Spritz and Glimmer Mist you can create the perfect background for a new card!

My next step was to figure out what direction I was going to go. I looked at my There She Goes stamps and chose the computer, "What's the 411?", and "Will Blog for Stamps." I also chose one of my stamps from a dollar bin that I knew would come in handy with my two daughters who I love to cheer on. I must say, they are good at cheering me on as well. We are a fairly supportive crew here in the Stack family! I also used Smooch Accent Ink for the tab on the folder.

The computer was quite fun to make. I used some glitter, my ColorBox and my chalk. I didn't have the image of this card in my head before I started, but I figured out a road map and took a few forks along the way. I am getting better and better at working with "little" pieces.

Then I felt like something was missing.... Hmmm... Ahhh yes, the ribbon (another addiction for this stamp-a-holic). So tie and bow..... The lower right corner had a bit of a gap so I found the hearts to add a little love!

Here it is! Hey! In case you're wondering... I "Will Blog For Stamps!"

Until next my next confession of a stamp-a-holic... Take Care!

Love U ~ Something from nothing

2011-05-02T20:41:00.000-07:00

This is my first attempt at blogging instructions on making a card. Feedback is welcome!

I was so disappointed with this card but there was something that kept drawing me back to it. It had all of the components I needed to submit for the Clearsnap portfolio I was putting together... but I hated it. The next evening I started plucking it apart to salvage what I could... I love this heart and needed to make sure I put it to good use.

I thought... what the heck, I will just start over! The first step was to use my new... (did you hear me? NEW) Big Shot that my parents bought me for my birthday (Cinco de Mayo = Sara's Birthday... Margaritas for everyone!) It was a good start; however, I needed a little pigment ink to smudge on the raised squares to give it a little more depth.

Ahhh... now we're cooking with oil! (or Clearsnap!) Next step was to use the dark purple Color Box piece of the pie, to smudge the edges up. I love doing this... pretty sure it's good for the soul cuz my soul is beaming! Smudge... smudge... Smudge...

Now a smooch with some SMOOCH! Since my theme turned into "Love," I thought I'd give the card a kiss with my new Smooch Ink... I am so in love with SMOOCH I could kiss it! I also used a little embossing powder to make sure the kiss didn't get rubbed off... Remembering what my children use to say, "rub it in, or wipe it off." I guarantee none of their kisses were wiped off of my cheek!

Punched out my letters from Colorbok (.. over the o), AlphaStax and played around until I found something that felt right. ..."Just about there... but it felt a little too balanced for me... Hmmm...

Ahhh yes, brass brads to finish the project off! That seems to move the eyes a little more!

Seriously Folks: Skinny cooks can't be trusted... Can you?

2011-04-21T19:25:00.000-07:00

Seriously Folks: Skinny cooks can't be trusted... Can you?

Skinny cooks can't be trusted... Can you?

2011-04-21T19:21:00.000-07:00

Ha... Skinny cooks can't be trusted! Look inside at the pristine kitchen and you'll see that this cook clearly hasn't been using her kitchen to cook for her family.

During my weeks I live alone in my little apartment, so my little kitchen stays fairly clean. When I am home, with my youngest (17 year old baby boy), and my hubby the kitchen tends to get more use. I've always had this thing about my kitchen. Generally I clean the kitchen up before I go to bed because I really really do not like getting up to a dirty kitchen. I also will clean the kitchen before I start to cook or bake. (My mom must be so proud as is Mrs. Halverson from home economics in Jr. High).

These TSG (There She Goes) stamps are proving to be a lot of fun! I am not a skinny cook and I can generally be trusted... What I'd give to not be trusted ;-)

Seriously Folks...

True Confessions of a Peep-aholic

2011-04-17T18:47:00.000-07:00

Father forgive me for I have sinned... I ate a whole package of Peeps before I even got home from the grocery story. Uhhh... what are Peeps? You're kidding right? ... No no, I know, you're not the kidding type and the confessional is sacred, talking about Peeps is kind of a weird thing to discuss with you. Peeps is not like anything nasty (not sure what you were thinking Father).

Peeps are like those pink, blue, green, yellow, actually more and more colors every year. They come in shapes of cute little bunnies, yellow chicks, you know... Easter-ish things... you know all about that. ... No Father, not that kind of chick, like chickens. No Father, the do not have crucifix Peeps, that would be just weird. No, they do not come in the Blessed Virgin shape either... speaking of chicks. Seriously Father, can I just get through this? I have not been to confession for six years and you get stuck on this? Kind of like the Peep I dropped, all warm and gooey, stuck to my shirt... proving my Catholic guilt to my family when they helped me carry the groceries in.

So I was at the grocery store, shopping frugally for my family, (yes, of course so I could give more to the church... tithing? I think I might have heard of that word) and the Peeps caught my eye. The colors were so inviting and the colored granules of sugar glistened in the fluorescent lighting. I swear, I was overcome with salivation, just like Pavlov's dog. ... No Father, not salvation... Right, that's what Easter is all about but my confession is only a small part of my salvation. Salivation, like mouth watering... Ummm... Sorry father, I wasn't trying to sound sensual. Please stop turning my Peep confession into something along the lines of a peep show, that's not how I roll... Umm, Father, I'm not sure you should know that much about peep shows. This is MY confession... save your's for the Bishop.

I was able to hold off opening the package until I finished shopping. I wanted to rip them open and devour them while I shopped. Yes Father, I realize that would be a sin as well... Well actually I had forgotten that even the "evil thought" of what would appear to be stealing is a sin, so let me add that to my list that I have brought with me. ... Can you see the list, uhh well let me see.... hmmm... so I was just kidding about the list, all I have is a grocery list. Lying is a sin, I realize that. I was not lying about having a list, I was just saying... Oh My God... it was a Joke Father. Oh for Christ sake, now I have to add using the Lord's name in vain to my list as well? Here's my list, it's really my grocery list. ... Ahhh, yes the wine on the list is for the Passover meal we are preparing.

... I just wanted to get the sin of gluttony off my chest Father! ...'Scuse me? I think you should not be able to see my chest through the screen, nor should you ask to brush it off. ... You were kidding? Now Father, I think you might be lying..But we're not going there!. So... I made it through the check out line, got the groceries in my car, and ripped that package open before I even got the key in the ignition... I was over come with emotional eating rage. I devoured every one of those sugary little Peeps... not the small package... the big package... like 16 Peeps in less than two minutes.

The man in the car next to me seriously gave me a look of disgust. Ummm... Did I know that priests don't always wear their collar? Did I know that priests shop for themselves? Well...I guess I never really thought about it. Oh... what kind of car do you drive Father? And when were you at the grocery store? Ahhh, that was you that was watching me devour the Peeps. Yes, I suppose I would have recognized you if I had been to church in the past year of so....

I am sorry for these and all the sins of my past life. Ummm can I have my list back? It's my grocery list. I don't want to forget the Peeps.

Need a Drink??? or know someone else who might?

2011-04-12T20:59:00.000-07:00

Sooo... Need a drink? I have started this collection of cards using my "There She Goes" stamps. Love, Love, Love them... Hoping you will find a card for someone you love. Certain to make someone smile. Really. Very fun, very cute. I will be posting more in the few days. Check it out!

http://www.etsy.com/shop/ackstay

iHurt iHeal iHelp iLive I'm Alive

2011-04-12T20:17:00.000-07:00

I was sitting in a meeting on Monday afternoon and the room started to spin... spin... spin... The pain within the confines of my head was beyond belief. The meeting ended and someone said something about notes to be sent somewhere and I nodded that it would get taken care of... "Just not right now," I thought to myself.

I packed up my computer and left. I came back to pick up my new Miche (which is a whole different blog topic). I left again and drove to my weekday apartment. Crap, I have to carry my stuff up. I was trying to be proactive this week and I brought my spring clothes to swap out with my sweaters and such. Carrying this tub reminded me that I popped something in my back yesterday when I was doing laundry (aging can suck at times). Upon dropping the 100 lb tub of clothes on the floor I was thinking, "I need to eat." I cooked up some hash browns that I knew would be mild on my tummy. Apparently, my Becky Homecky cooking 101 cleanup skills were blocked by the bomb ticking in my head.

I burned my tongue as I ate (in my blowup bed ~ another blog story to stay tuned for), and I got up to make sure I turned the stove off... twice that I can remember. I was able to take a couple of pain relief tablets and keep them down. As I fell into my bed I heard the 4:00 Hormel whistle blow... Really? I am home from work by 4:00? That's rare. ZZZZzzzz

I was dead to the world, except for my breathing (fortunately). I awoke at about 8:30 pm and tried to work... that lasted about 15 minutes and I fell asleep again. Around 11:30 I awoke and emailed my boss indicating that things tomorrow were looking ugly. I told her I would set my alarm and let her know. Thank heaven's I remembered what I told her because I did just that. I still had hopes of going in for the afternoon... Hilarious! I awoke at 2:30 to about 400 emails and dropped back off for a couple more hours.

I am alive now. Barely alive, but alive. My head still aches, my back still hurts, but I am celebrating the fact that I should be able to go to work tomorrow. I will have so many things to catch up on but being alive is a good thing. This goes to all of my friends and families who have daily aches and pains, terminal illness, things that hurt and no one knows why... every day. You are all great and need to know that we are here to help... You have to call though! Even if you just need someone to sit while you sleep. I am here for you.

de Funk

2011-04-03T11:48:00.000-07:00

Why is it that "funk" is easier for me to write about than cheerfulness or elation?

Sundays almost always escort my emotions into a funk these days. How unfortunate that we fall into funks despite living fulfilling lives where we frequently find family and friends, fine foods, and fantastic fashion at our fingertips.

Within the past 12 months, I have been demoted, unemployed, had my second of 3 graduate from high school & leave for college, obtained employment deserving of my experience and education, moved out of my home into an apartment 75 miles away from my husband and high school son, said goodbye to people, and welcomed new souls into my circle. On weekends I venture back "home" where I can unlax, be reminded why I fell in love with my husband, and be cued as to why it is essential that our children eventually leave our nests, and build their own that they can keep as clean or messy as they choose.

Life is full of funk as well as full of cheer. I feel we are in funky times; however, I would imagine that history is a series of one funk after another. Elation, on the other hand, seems to strike on occasion: extending it's hand to us and lead us through one funk and into the next. I ponder... am I that much of a pessimist that I leap from funk to funk instead of cheer to cheer? Really? I don't believe most of my friends and my immediate family would suggest that's how I live; but maybe I have a skewed perception of my day to day demeanor. Dare I ask... "Do I appear to be in a funk... like every day?" Will their answers defunk me or enfunk me? Either will happen regardless of their responses, yet I will choose my funk-tion independently... thank you very much.

Not sure I want to know the answer to that... am guessing there are many who can see beyond the glimmer in my eyes, into the sadness of my soul. Is everyone's soul sad and scarred? My soul is shrouded in strength and love, yet the funk takes over and tries to stamp out the fun of life . Maybe its the funk that makes me a better person today than I was yesterday... maybe the function of the funk is to kick my soul's ass into doing something functionally fantastic that will never be forgotten. Maybe...

Maybe instead of going to work tomorrow I will head on over to Funky Town that will keep me moving... so the funk can never find me.

Ugh... Parenthood

2010-10-03T17:32:00.000-07:00

I am the mother of 3 great kids. To date we have not had to deal with any drug or alcohol issues, failing grades (for the most part), school problems (outside of a couple of detentions and yes... one suspension), or terrible mouthy nasty behaviors (beyond age 14 when they are using their mouths to declare their independence from us). Honestly, we have three awesome children who are becoming adults.

Today is my baby boy's 17th birthday. I can remember the day he was born like it was yesterday. I think my exact words were, "Get it out of me!" at the end of labor, as he rather liked the comforts of his first home. He has never been one for abrupt change so it only makes sense that he try to stay in his comfort zone despite the fact that he was growing out of it. I on the other hand, was more than ready to get him off of my bladder and into my arms.

Last night we were enjoying some company in our driveway with our new little fire pit. It is new to us but was given to us by the friends who we were enjoying it with. Zay came home early, he had been playing poker with the guys and was home around 10:30, which is unusual for him. He tends to be more of a 12:00 guy and never pushes much past that. He generally checks in and has never demonstrated that he was using any chemicals, and hasn't been followed home by the police as his sister was once, but that is a whole different story. When we got in the house he was playing his new X Box soccer game and seemed to be fine with being home. He said he was bored so he left. That's a good thing!

This morning, on his birthday, at 10:30 our doorbell rang and there was a fierce knock on the door. My husband was moving toward the door and I hear him say, "the police?" He opened the door and a loud voice said, "Does Isaiah Stack live here?" Ummm, quietly, "yes." Loudly, "IS HE HOME?" Quietly, "Yes, I'll get him." The officer was too busy puffing himself up with his huge gun across his chest, when I popped my head up and said, "Uh, this isn't a very nice way to start the week. Is my son in trouble?" He barked that we would see, and asked if my son had a Skateboard. I responded no, and he proceeded to ask if he has ever had one. I was thinking about responding that he had one when he was 8 and we lived in Spooner, WI. Thinking that we might still have it but he barked at me, "I suppose you would know if he had one." I chose not to respond because the answer was too, long, he was being an ass, and I was terrified of what Zay might have done.

When Zay got down the stairs with his sleepy eyes I could see he was terrified. My husband, Zay's dad, upon going into his room was quietly saying, "If you did something wrong I want to hear it before we go down there." Zay said, "I didn't do anything!" The officer started in about the paper route last Sunday. He got his name from the Free Press, who he is in his 5th year of delivering papers for, 364 days/year, (great, now what are they thinking about him?) He asked if he saw anyone last Sunday. My husband stepped in and said that he usually delivers the Sunday papers (he likes to let Zay sleep in 1 day/week ~ good papa). Last Sunday was foggy and some young man with a skateboard tried flagging my husband down, looking like he wanted a ride. Rob is a nice guy but he was in the middle of the route so he thought he would wait until he was finished to see if he was still around. He finished up, and had forgotten to deliver one paper so backtracked. When he saw the guy he thought, "Nah, too scary looking," which is totally not a Rob thing so he must have looked rough.

Rob's story aligned well with the story the officer was looking for so I don't think Zay had to say anything. Whew, not sure the cat would have allowed his tongue to express his thoughts. The officer made a couple of comments about the story and asked Zay what school he went to. He had spoken with the liaison officer from East and West High schools in town and they said, "this kid doesn't exist in our system". He then assumed he went to Central, "the EBD School". I quietly said, "Hey, I teach those EBD kids." He barked, "Then you know what I mean, hehehe." Isaiah said, "I go to Loyola," and the officer said, "Yes, much better than the EBD school." I was thinking, "Walk a mile in their shoes before you judge, buddy."

Yeah, what ever is what we were all thinking. The Peace Officer told Zay he is a retired paper delivery boy, and talked about how they notice things with homes, like when the same lights are on every day, and how noticing those things can be helpful to police. He thanked us and left. "Have a good day folks." As he walked out I quietly said, "Zay, Happy Birthday." He laughed a nervous laugh and tried to go back to bed. He was downstairs in five minutes because I think he was pretty wound up from the stress of the incident.

Seriously Folks... Wish Zay a Happy Birthday! Let's hope the rest of the year goes better.

Autumn Falling

2010-09-19T19:25:00.000-07:00

We camped this weekend... it was incredible. Yesterday I was in heaven sitting by the campfire, relaxing with a glass of wine, chattig w/my hubby, and pretending I had nothing else to do except spend time with nature enjoying her beauty. Ahhhhh.... My soul was so at peace.

Today I woke up to a completely different experience. It was a beautiful day but my body was punishing me for being so happy yesterday. It seems my lunar cycle had some things to say about me thinking I could enjoy myself. I was a trooper but my heart wasn't in the mood any more. We had our mountain man breakfast with bacon, egg beaters, simply pototoes, and some low fat cheese. Mmmm... and campstove coffee by a camp fire. I felt a piece of heaven then... wished I could stay forever.

Upon tearing down camp, we went for a short bike ride so my hubby could take some pix of these very cool trees. I attached a link to my favorite picutre... I was drowsy and in pain so I eventually laid down on the ground. You know how in the summer when you lay on the sand and you feel the heat being absorbed by your body? Well, this time the ground was sucking the heat from me. It had been cloudy for a couple days, and was still before noon. The ground was cool... sucked the heat from me like the Demeators sucked life from Harry Potter.

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=337374&fbid=153640257991297&id=100000359714890&ref=nf#!/photo.php?pid=337377&fbid=153640321324624&id=100000359714890

It made me sad. Made me think of the temperatures falling, leaves falling, snow falling, and summer energy falling... down, down, down into the abyss. Ugh... do we have to go too? I love summer... and autumn... but we are falling into winter. Brrr...

Random Thoughts from a Teacher

2010-09-15T17:11:00.000-07:00

Today... crabby... stabby... just leave me alone.

Driving to work there are grain trucks slowing us all down. Mullets on the road. MOVE IT!

I stayed up late writing an IEP ~ yeah me! It was a tough case and I did a nice job.

We met today and it was the first time I ever proposed a refusal for services... I rock... it worked.

Everyone wants a piece of me... NOW! I can't get everything done and teach ~ duh...
so I just taught and let the other stuff wait until the end of the day.

My phone is blinking... hope its not important.

At the end of the day I found out our 2:30 meeting was downtown...
so the stuff that was waiting will still be waiting tomorrow morning.

I am frustrated because my role has changed so much but there is a big part of me that wants to continue doing the old job... but wait... I don't get paid to do that. The so called "big bucks" are going to my new supervisor who had my job added to her already more than 1.0 FTE administrative position.

The kids are great. They make me laugh, make me frustrated, but validate my teaching ability.

So many changes... I am a change junkie until it affects me... then I have withdrawals from the past.

So there... that's a not so great day in the life of my first year back in the classroom.

Today the "dark side" looked really enticing... too bad I couldn't cross over.

So much to say...

2010-09-13T18:59:00.000-07:00

So I am secretly blogging my year of teaching. I want so much to share with all of you but I can't due to confidentiality. Once I am on track I will be able to focus more on something besides my job and blog about the other parts of my life. Amazing bike rides, preparing for empty nesting in two years, trying to adjust to the testosterone and lack of estrogen in the house, and life in general. Just the interesting stuff... really... I am interesting.

Seriously folks... I'll work on it.

NonContracted Day: But I worked anyway

2010-09-03T18:57:00.000-07:00

Now I remember the energy and thought that goes into the first day of school with kids. My room looks awesome, I have a schedule mapped out in my head, I know what classes I am teaching, but there was no possible way for me to be ready for the first official day of school for students had I not worked today for free. I am still not ready and I will be working on things (at home since my school is 60+ miles away) to prepare for students. When I move back into an administrative position I will remember this...

Actually, I will be writing a book based on this year. I was going to blog every day; however, due to confidentiality issues I feel it is necessary for me to continue this in another fashion. I will continue to write daily... that is my commitment... but I can't risk breeching confidentiality of my students and they are part of my story.

For anyone who read yesterday's blog about "unteachable", I had my meeting with him today and he is far from "unteachable". He did share with me that he was told that's what he was... He will be a key part of my book. I anticipate he may be a challenge to teach at times but he is brilliant, charming, verbally gifted, a good self advocate, and wants a high school diploma. He and I are going to prove that he is indeed "teachable"...

Seriously Folks... You will be able to read all about it. Just not any more this year. Sorry... I don't want to lose my license...

Day 2: Teacher Workshop

2010-09-01T19:14:00.000-07:00

Wow! What can I possibly say that will describe the accomplishments of today? We have an amazing team up at the Transition Program and are gelling nicely. I am astonished at what we come up with when we all put our heads together... I think all of us processed last night and our ideas just blend perfectly. Everyone seemed happy.

For the past three years as an administrator for this program I was half time in the building and half time in an independent school district. My directive was to serve the district primarily and the program as best as I could. I did just that and served the district well. I always felt as though I was not serving the program to the best of my ability; every time I would immerse myself into it, a crisis in the district would pull me away and I had to change my line of thinking. The part time status made it easy to disengage from the program which was my coping strategy. I know... I'm a terrible administrator, but that's what I had to do so I wouldn't drive myself crazy.

Today I put my room together, scrounged for lamps and furniture (tables, chairs, and hopefully a white board for my empty wall). I found a book shelf and organized my desk and hooked up my computer. Honestly, I didn't dream it would look as relaxing as it does. Its a classroom but I don't like to have the florescent lights on so I use low lighting as much as possible. The custodian said to put a couch in and he could easily nap and the tech guy said, "Wow! I love what you did with the place!" (I took that as a compliment even though our tech guy isn't a "typical atypical" tech guy... if you know what I mean.

Our open house was amazing... I think I heard that 26 of our 46 students showed up. Remember, these are 18-21 year old students. We also had guest speakers from the county, ARC, and adult service providers. We planned this last spring... and have been talking about bringing service providers in for a couple of years. this was the beginning of the dream...

Seriously Folks... I think this year is going to be amazing.

Day 1: Teacher Workshop

2010-08-31T18:18:00.000-07:00

We started out with a great breakfast and awards for years of service (which I am convinced I will never achieve anywhere). Do you know that some people actually work in the same place for 30 years? I have mixed feelings about staying anywhere that long... many people become entrenched in the organization and lose perspective. I see a lot of the long timers struggle with change the most. There must be some satisfaction in staying some place for years as well... I'm not sure its for me; however, I respect people who can sit still for that long. I'd like to shoot for 10 years in one place to round out my career (some day) but in the meantime I will take it one year at a time. This will be my 4th year with this place of employment.

During the break... our program discovered that we had acquired another licensed teacher, construction on a handicap accessible bathroom would be started soon, we may have a program lead, and we still do not have a van to take students from point A to point B. As a community based program transportation has been an issue, a very costly issue. The "driver" rules and regulations have become very complex and difficult to manage and most staff have no interest in driving. But... in order to drive we have to have a district vehicle anyway as we are not allowed to have students in our own cars (and frankly, I'm OK with that).

We had an amazing presentation on prescription and over the counter drugs. Pharmaceutical companies are ruthless and their marketing plans include preying on the most likely to ask for medication. They preyed on parents of children with ADHD and the adults taking medication for ADHD has skyrocketed in the past few years. There are only two countries that allow advertisement of prescription drugs to the public ~ The US and _______ can you guess who else? I was shocked. Think kiwi...

Now for the awkward part of the day... the Union luncheon. As an administrator I perceived the Union as the enemy... maybe that's harsh but I am allowed to have my own perceptions. I know the Union protects and serves; however, I struggle when our focus becomes teacher rights over student rights. There is no middle ground. Our organization existed for more than 30 years w/o a Union. Now as a teacher I will have to pay Union Dues again... Seriously? Sorry Union Jacks, I just can't jump on that wagon with you. I will pay my dues but don't expect me to attend the "Fall Drive-In" or any other jack me up rallies. I am going to stick with educating students as my focus and will just be happy to have a job this year. Keep on negotiating our contracts ~ that's not a job I would want.

Our final part of the day was in our program, without our program administrator (which I was last year). Yeah... that was awkward as well. Maybe more so than the luncheon. I did feel the need to stand up and take the lead in trying to organizing which para will be with which student... mostly because I am visual and the white board was staring at me screaming for some verbiage to be written on it. We have a good start... we have some glitches... & we have some people who will have to be moved around. Tomorrow evening is our open house and during the day we will do more structuring. We are a work in progress...

Seriously Folks... I would say that today was productive. I am learning to be on the front lines of education again. Working directly as a case manager is not the same as being a program administrator and having the ability to hunker down behind my desk when the going gets tough.

First Day of School Thoughts

2010-08-30T07:40:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is my first contracted day of school. No students yet, but after 10 years of being "on the dark side" as an administrator, I am walking back into the light of the classroom. I think it will be an interesting year, kind of like a first year teaching again which is a great perspective for an administrator to have. What are my fears? Well, the same fears as I have with everything else ~ FAILURE. What if I can't effectively teach anymore? Awww... I will be fine...

My assignment is to teach 18-21 year old students with emotional and behavioral disorders. Most of these students have average intelligence, have not been able to attain the credits necessary to graduate, come from homes where education isn't highly valued, and many have mental illness or chemical issues. This isn't a "cream of the crop" crew of students (according to some); however, this is my favorite group of students to work with. Generally, it is a group made up of personalities similar to Bender, from the Breakfast Club, or modern day characters from The Outsiders. I know they will challenge my patience but I also know they have the ability to show they are competent in areas that will earn them a diploma.

One of my biggest challenges is the fact that these kids are little kids in big bodies. This population has learned that behaviors provide them with desired outcomes. For example, Johnny calls his teacher a F%*#ing B*#%$. Johnny is suspended from school for the next two days. Johnny gets what he wants. He can avoid school... which he hates even though it is the only stable place he has. It's funny because on his suspended days he is observed hanging around the high school (where else would he go?)

My job is a very important job and it is in my best interest to develop a unconditional professional relationship with these young adults. My intent is to approach this position much as a manager approaches her employees. I will set the expectations, provide the students with feedback, and let them know where they stand as an employee/student of mine. Some behaviors get you fired, some behaviors get you promoted in life...

Stay Tuned... I plan to use this year as an opportunity to write about what I learn about being in the classroom, working with this population up close and personal, accomplishments, and failures. I am not afraid of failure because I know that in order to reach the next level I must have learning opportunities. Failure = Building blocks for success.

Seriously Folks... watch me succeed.

Where Did It Go?

2010-07-05T17:31:00.000-07:00

Where did it go?

The time... the time we spent craving each other?

Every moment of separation was spent counting minutes until we could be together again.

Remember that lustful ache?

Where did the time go when we were bringing our first baby home from the hospital, scared, excited, and so incredibly in love with a new little being who was our responsibility?

I can remember it like it was yesterday.

Then there was the time when I tried to slice my thumb into two instead of one... somehow I knew there was another little somebody growing inside of me and the blood test confirmed it.

We didn't have jobs... we were poor... we were three... then we were four.

Where did that time go?

Our hearts were enmeshed with responsibility, diapers, day care, and toys.

That time was not that long ago.

Or was it?

Where did the time go... we so wanted a boy though we didn't say that outloud.

We wanted a healthy baby, but the fact that he was a baby boy made it the perfect family of five.

He was snuggly, sweet, and all three kids, and you, and sometimes me... Played.

We all camped, and hiked, and read books together... that time is gone.

Where did it go?

We all piled into the Seabring with our duffle bags and "stuff" and went to California.

The excitement was incredible.

We saw Mickey Mouse, we were splashed at SeaWorld, and we felt the ocean wash over us.

That was the best, I want to feel that today.

Now.

Where did the time go?

We started with two, then three, then four... now five...

Where will it go from here?

Where will the time take us?

How many of "us" will there be?

What memories will we all hold?

Which tales will last and which will be lost in time?

We know time disappears.

Where does the time go?

The Devil Made Me Do It

2009-12-08T17:00:00.000-08:00

A flashback came to me today on my way home from work. I have no idea where it came from but we had been talking about some kids making bad decisions today and I must have been thinking about some of my poorer choices as a youngster.

I suppose I should first share a little piece about my upbringing and education. My parents were good parents, always tried to teach us right from wrong in the best ways they knew how. Good or bad parenting skills their intentions were always in our best interest... just as my parenting skills are.

I went to Kindergarten in a public school and then attended Catholic School for 1-6. My first nun teacher was Sr. Verna in 3rd grade and I loved her until she made me feel really bad for an incomplete a reading assignment. I was an Ace of a student and she moved me from the high reading group (bluebirds) to the low reading group (crows) while publicly humiliating me and the lower readers. I remember hearing the tears dropping on my paper and thinking I would die from guilt. "What possessed you to think you could be in this reading group when you don't even do your work?" Other school offenses up to that time include yelling really loud in first grade when someone asked me if they could get me a book... I freaked on this little girl and I remember Mrs. Sodaburger saying my name and looking at me with a very disappointed expression. Yup... the tears started flowing. I can still hear my voice yelling... I must have been possessed in that beautiful Catholic school. Also in first grade I was talking in the bathroom with a girl from another class. Each of us were in our stalls doing our business and she fell off the potty! She said it was my fault and she was going to tell my teacher. "I remember saying I didn't make you do it, don't tell!"

All day long I waited for my teacher to expel me from school because of this. I don't remember tears, but I am sure they were there cuz that's what kind of a kid I was.

Another incident that stands out as "big trouble" was when I had a crush on Danny in second grade. On an extremely nice spring day Cheryl, Danny, Stan, and I all took our jackets off and laid in the sun. Sister Bernice told Cheryl and I that we were brazen hussies and we ought to be ashamed of ourselves. I had no idea what it was that I had done, but I knew it was bad. Kind of like the time in Kindergarten (my first day by the way) when a sixth grade boy put his leg across the isle and said I couldn't get off the bus until I showed him my pussy. I didn't even have a cat and was glad I didn't, because he made a pussy sound really ugly. Yup... more tears once I escaped the bus. (By the way, I have only had my children ride the bus for about two weeks in their school careers. The sexual harassment did not end for me in kindergarten on the bus and I never told anyone because I always felt like it was my fault some how). The possessed know that the bad in the world is their fault.

I cannot forget to mention Sr. Ida as she was the one who really instilled that good old Catholic guilt into me. Sr. Ida taught us religion... old fashioned, frightening, scare the crap out of you, fear of the devil religion. It must have been around the time of "The Exorcist" because we were talking about the devil taking over people's lives. I remember her reading some scripture about a child being possessed and how he frothed at the mouth, made gargling noises, and how Jesus removed Satan from his soul. (Is this really in the Bible? It sounds like seizures to me and probably was something medical). She told us the way to prevent possession of the devil was to pray the Our Father. Needless to say, many tears fell at night out of sheer terror, and I said my quota of Our Fathers for a lifetime. I didn't sleep for weeks. By nightlight and flashlight I read many books including Helen Keller, Sr. Beatrice Goes to Bat, and a hundred other books. Anything but sleep. I prayed and prayed and prayed when I got so tired that I couldn't read any more. It's no wonder I was sick all the time.

So the biggy... the incident that sparked this blog and prevented me from sleeping for many nights.... drum roll please....

I was in Chippewa Falls, Wisconsin hanging out with my cousins. We had freedoms in Chippewa Falls that we did not have as country kids. We had walked across the bridge and gone downtown for sodas or something. I think I was going into fourth grade (at best). My sister was two years older than me and our cousins were the same ages as us. We were back on their side of the river, not the nicest part of town but back then I didn't know the good side of town from the not so good. There was this abandoned house that was supposedly going to be torn down. My cousin was talking about the house and saying how the older kids threw rocks through the window and how the lady next door to the house was always peeking through the curtains looking for the criminals. Well... you can guess what happened next... Someone dared me to throw a rock through the window. I think they even put the rock in my hand. Trying to prove that I was as cool as the "older kids" I threw the rock and broke one of the last windows in the house. I honestly didn't think I could hit anything with a rock and there were very few windows left to break. I can still hear the window shatter. Mrs. Screech came out and started yelling, everyone ran, and the terror of what I had done set in. My cousin and sister talked about being able to trace the rock to me because of the finger prints and because the neighbor lady saw me. I survived the next couple of days in Chippewa Falls moving on to another cousins house and feeling safe; however, when we got back home I didn't sleep for days... certain I had been possessed by Satan and that was why I threw the rock, yelled at the little girl in first grade, made the girl fall off the potty, didn't complete my reading assignment, and was a brazen hussy in second grade laying in sin on my jacket in the sunshine with three friends. I rarely frothed at the mouth but thank God the "Our Fathers" saved my sinful little soul.

Seriously Folks, say your prayers tonight... "Our Father, Who art in Heaven...."

Life, Depression & Me

2009-09-22T18:17:00.000-07:00

I suppose, since I wrote the dreadfully depressing "Seduced by Life and Depression" I should follow up with some details on how my break-up with Depression is going. Some of my friends and family may know that I have had an on-again off-again relationship with depression, possibly since my late teens. One never can pinpoint when the seduction begins but for many of us... it is a lifelong affair (much to the chagrin of our spouses/family members.) So... where am I today?

It begins each morning with the soft sound of the alarm
I open my eyes and hit the snooze uncertain of how much energy I am feeling
Depression gives me a hug and says, "I love you"
Life says, "I love you too; however, the important thing is that you love you and you love Life"
"Indeed," I say but I notice the pain in Depression's eyes - a reflection of my own
I feel Depression's pain in my soul but know that I am not responsible for his happiness - only my own
Life gently pushes me toward the hot shower that I crave but a piece of me longs to lie down for the day
The whispers of Depression circle in my head but the pull of life is stronger today than yesterday
Life has encouraged me to be brave while Depression points out my weaknesses
Why don't I leave him for good?
Part of it is that we go so far back, the three of us - Life, Depression & Me
How do I exclude someone who has made me who I am
Without my affairs with Depression I would be weak and insensitive
I am strong & Sensitive
Without my my love of Life I would idle and static
My Life is a moving target and I am not static
The three of us belong together
We are family who each accept one another for who we are
Depression and Life are brothers who fight with determination to win my love
They have both won and none of us lose
For we love who we are in good times and bad and one can't exist without the other

Society says, "You're weak"
I say, "You're insensitive"
People say, "Suck it up"
I say, "I haven't time for you if that's how you see it"
When you take me, you get the three... it is all or none

Seriously Folks: Seduced by Life and Depression

2009-09-22T18:08:00.000-07:00

Seriously Folks: Seduced by Life and Depression

2009-09-06T13:50:00.000-07:00

Well... the sound of the cicadas fills the air. When I was young I asked my mom what that noise was and she said it was the electricity running through the wires. In a sense, it is an electricity... I wonder if she knows it is the cicadas? I will have to ask the next time I see her. Really amazing creatures.

Finding the empty shells of them on the trees was like finding a gold mine! Some cicadas stay underground eating the sap from roots for 17 years. I always wonder how they know when 17 years is up. Is there some kind of cicada calendar that is like new years for us? By the sounds of it they are having one heck of a party! It seems to me they are a little later this year than they have been in the past. It was a cooler summer so maybe they hit the snooze button a few extra times.

Autumn is like a sensory overload. Think about the sights, sounds, smells, and even tactile experiences. Truly, there is nothing like it any other time of the year... for me anyway... living where I live. The colors jump out at me, the sounds are deafening, and the smells I associate with Autumn are natural. I've never smelled a candle that had the scent of Autumn unless it was pumpkin, apple, or cinnomon. The natural smells just can't be reproduced though one would make a fortune to come up with the right combination of... of what? Dust? Pollen? Dying vegetation? I wonder what I love about the smells? Can't put my finger on it, but there is something amazing that makes me want more.

Some of these sights, sounds, and smells of late summer are kind of sad for many of us Midwestern folks. Truly, I absolutely adore Autumn. There is only one thing I dislike about Autumn, there is an end to it. I suppose though, I lived in an environment that had the colors of Autumn year round (can you imagine?) I probably would crave green, bright pinks and purples in flowers, and the scent of summer (sweet clover, mowed grass, alfalfa).

The interesting thing about the colors of autumn to me are that we go from the main secondary color of green to the primary colors of red and yellow. My favorite is the secondary color of orange. I find it very cool that the colors we see in the fall are hiding in the leaves in small amounts all summer long, the chlorophyl just keeps them under cover. I suppose I will never truly understand how leaves of green can turn to leaves of yellow, red, orange, maroon, gold, and a whole crayon box full of other amazing names I don't need to understand it, I just need to appreciate every minute of it before the leaves grow week and let go of the branch that bears them.

Seriously Folks: Seduced by Life and Depression

2009-08-31T12:46:00.000-07:00

Seriously Folks: Seduced by Life and Depression

Appyhay Irthdaybay!!!

2009-08-24T00:01:00.000-07:00

Appyhay Irthdaybay otay ouyay,
Appyhay Irthdaybay otay ouyay,
Appyhay Irthdaybay earday derstandblueunday,

Appyhay Irthdaybay otay ouyay!

Earday Ydialay,

Eway ecidedday otay onorhay ouyay noay ouryay irthdaybay! Opehay ouyay joyenay isthay ibutetray onay ouryay ecialspay ayday.

Owhay dolay areay ouyay ownay?

Owhay dolay areay ouyay Ydialay?

Owhay dolay areay ouyay ownay?

Osay ouyay owknay ouyay areay ovedlay ybay anymay enwhay erethay isay ogblay ophay edicatedday ustjay orfay ouyay!

Incerelysay,

Ackstay

Next Stop:

Gary Guetzlaff @

http://xlsior.blogspot.com/2009/08/08-24-09.html

Bacon Blog Hop

2009-08-16T08:35:00.000-07:00

Seriously Folks... this is absolutely perfect... just like Bacon!

There is a resturaunt in Lancaster, CA called Crazy Otto's that served the best breakfast with the best bacon ever. My husband and I enjoyed Crazy Otto's 21 years ago when we were young and in love. (This week is our 20th anniversary).

Almost 35 years ago, Otto Lindsel left the forests of the northern west coast and moved to the Antelope Valley to be nearer to his family. Apparently Otto was a quick tempered man but he knew how to serve a high calorie breakfast. A side of bacon was a plate with a mound of Bacon that we would pass around after a night of poker or other evening activities.

For almost 25 years, Crazy Otto’s was located adjacent to the train tracks on Sierra Highway in Lancaster. He diner originally consisted of 122 counter seats and one booth. Over the years, the diner expanded in an effort to accommodate the large crowds, eventually ending up with two separate and distinct kitchens and dining rooms. Due to the proximity of the railroad tracks to Crazy Otto’s, Otto devised a numbered wheel to be spun every time a train passed. The counter space corresponding to the number on the wheel won a free meal.

As a result of the 1994 Northridge earthquake and damage to California freeways, it was determined that the old building was too close to the railroad tracks and Metrolink required the property on which Crazy Otto’s was located.

Sadly, the new resturaunt is more like many other standard breakfast joints as my husband and I discovered when we brought the kids on a vacation. It still brought back the memories of the place on the tracks though, and our early life together as a couple. (I think we are still carrying some of our "bacon weight" from those days).

My new resturaunt love is the Cafe in Ames, IA.
Everything is locally grown, more nutritious than Crazy Otto's,
and the meat is locally raised. I enjoyed a BLTMA Pizza last night which consists of:

Flatbread Pizza Crust
Bacon - Peppered Bacon (Amazing!)
Romaine Lettuce Shredded on the top when it's done
Tomatoes
Mozzerella Cheese
Avacado's cut into about 1/8's and laid on top

Robert, my meat lover ordered the steak sandwich and said, "Next time I am getting that pizza you got. That was so tasty!"

We love bacon but we don't love frying it so we order our pre-cooked bacon from the Schwan's man. Robert and I enjoy one hot breakfast together each weekend where I fix him an egg sandwhich with bacon and cheese. I'm not one to wait on people and this is almost a guaranteed for him, once a week. We had no bacon today but we still enjoyed our little egg sandwhiches together. Seriously folks, it is ironic we had no bacon on Bacon Blog Hop day:-(

Your next stop of the Bacon Blog Hop is:
http://xlsior.blogspot.com/2009/08/birth-of-bacon.html

2009-08-11T17:21:00.000-07:00

Tasty Treasures of summer...

Every spring I get anxious for the wonderful treasures that summer brings. I don't want to go hurting Spring's feelings; however, here in MN spring has its ups and downs. On the downside, Spring can bring tons of snow, lots of mud, and dirty snow piles that never seem to go away. The positive notes of spring are those 60 degree days that bring the scent of growth and new life, the little crocus', and later in spring, the greening up of the trees, and the song birds waking us up every morning.

As spring turns to summer, we plan, we plant, we water, and we wait... and wait... and wait. Now, In August (when we are growing tired of weeding and watering) we reap the rewards of our efforts. Tomatoes galore! There is nothing that I know of that tastes better than home grown tomatoes. I have to be careful not to eat them all as I pick them. Honestly, I love them. Every lunch is tomato heaven in a container. The ultimate...

Caprese Salad:

2 large, ripe tomatoes
1/2 pound fresh mozzarella balls
1/2 cup fresh basil leaves
Sea salt or kosher salt and pepper, to taste
1 Tbsp Extra Virgin Olive Oil

Honestly, I need nothing else to eat.

I wonder if woman can live off of Caprese Salad alone?

I also make a pretty amazing Pico De Gallo... Always a big hit! Our basic recipe is:

1 Vidallia Onion Chopped

1/2 lime squeezed over onions

1 or 2 Cucumbers peeled and chopped

1 bunch of radishes chopped

2-6 Blanched/peeled/chopped tomatoes

(romas work well for Pico but then use more)

1 Jalapeno Pepper de-seeded and chopped

(add seeds according to your fire index)

Cilantro (I love cilantro so use a lot,

some prefer just a smidgen)

Season with Salt to taste

Serve with chips or add to a chopped avocado to make Guacamole. Delicious!

These are the flavors of summer I truly love. The aesthetic value of the foods make it more pleasurable as well! When you look at finished products they are pieces of edible art! What could be better? Looks good, tastes good, and nutrient packed. Foods from Mother Earth.

Seriously Folks,

I need to go make some amazing summer Tasty Treasures!

Seduced by Life and Depression

2009-08-06T12:36:00.000-07:00

It starts with the soft sound of the alarm every morning
I open my eyes and the battle begins
With his soft sultry voice Depression wraps his arms around me and says “Stay”
Life abruptly pulls me up and says, “Live”
Depression holds my arms down while Life opens my prescription bottle
“Here” says Life as I cup my hand and pop the pill into my mouth
Depression is looking at me in a seducing manner and patting the warm bed smiling
Life tosses me my towel and leads me to the bathroom where he starts the water
During my shower I can hear Life and Depression bickering about how productive I will be
I wonder who will win today
I return to my room clad with my towel not caring if they see me since they know my soul
Life has my clothes laid out while Depression scoffs at his choice
“These hideous clothes are very unflattering” I believe him
I apprehensively go to my closet for a different outfit knowing nothing is flattering
Life hands me something he knows I will wear, black skirt and shirt
I dress myself and drink my coffee while putting my make-up on to cover the sadness
Depression is still calling my name softly enticing
Life is more aggressive suggesting things to do today
Sometimes I listen
Sometimes there is too much to listen to
Life knows when to stop talking so I can think
Depression keeps yammering on telling me that Life is too risky
Scaring me back into his warm safe arms under the covers

I am a lucky one
Life is stronger than Depression… today
I worry about those who love the stronger more charismatic Depression who is more aggressive
What if my love for Life was passive and weak
I’d be sleeping with my devoted Depression in our warm safe bed
With Life waiting for me to awaken

Sara Stack
August 6, 2009

2009-07-23T13:38:00.000-07:00

Look closely... do you know what this is?

This is the footprint of hundreds of thousands of people who had to get a better view of "paradise" in Southern MN. There is a small creek that created a nice sized water fall which draws thousands of people every year. Those who are aware of our part of the country often think of corn fields and hog barns... which isn't terribly far off; however, I am a firm believer that every part of the country has it's beauty hidden by the monotony of the paved roads. Sometimes, you have to travel a little out of your way to find the spot that will bring you a step closer to being one with nature, but it is always worth the extra distance. This particular spot, Minneopa Falls, just happens to be "protected" because it is a State Park. It is always a quandry to "protect" land... The Eagles song, The Last Resort says, "Call something paradise and kiss it good-bye" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y7JNbd6XU14 . I'm not sure we have to kiss it good-bye though; but is it possible to "Leave no trace?" I would say "no" according to these foot prints.

Even small critters like cats can create a trail. At one of our houses in the country we had a kitty trail from the back step to the garage, they used the same path every day and there was a skinny little trail... kind of cute. Imagine what an elephant path looks like! We find deer paths, ants have paths, and birds have flight paths. This path is a much larger people size trail, most stay on the obvious route; however, despite signs there are a few of us who have to see what lies beyond the easy paths of the world.

So... where do these footsteps lead? To a child's dream, a parent's nightmare (if their kids escape), a family vista point, a lover's haven, a photographers calendar shot, and a hiker's destination (though it is not a long hike). Waterfalls draw people from all walks of life. Sometimes trickling and other times thundering, they are just something that you have to see, hear, and feel - close up. Seeing them from the fenced section on the top just isn't enough for some. How can you not get closer... it is magnetic! Photos never quite give the falls justice, that's why you have to go there yourself, to feel the spray of the water on your skin, and for a moment be one with nature if you are fortunate enough to be there without other rule breakers. This is one of the places where children tantrum when it is time to leave. I remember family reunions at Minnehaha Falls in Minneapolis... my family wasn't an off the path kind of group... we never wanted to leave. It was just too amazing and I knew we wouldn't get back to such beauty for a long time. As a child it is like you discovered this place, even though you saw hundreds of other people in the same spot. Guess it takes a few years to make the connection as to why the park was created.

So back to the question, can we exist without leaving a trace? Impossible! Every blade of grass we step on, stone we throw, flower we pick, or critter we cage is an alteration of the world... for better or for worse. The key is to make every alteration as positive as possible. We've come along way since the 70's when litter on a highway was standard - can you believe that? Disgusting! Our protected parks are a gift however controversial they might be. Usually that's were we find the hidden places that you have to see. Granted, not every park has the glory of Yosemite with hundreds of amazing things to see; however, every place has it's hidden wonder. I love getting off the highway and finding those places and am extremely lucky to have a soul mate who is exceptional at knowing where they are.

I leave you with Minnehaha Falls. A place I haven't been for a long time. Think I'll make a point of it to bring my family there this summer when we are all together again. We will leave as small of a trace as possible. Hope to see you there!

2009-07-19T17:48:00.000-07:00

My father in law made this shelf out of an original door from their homestead farm in North Dakota. What I know about their farm is that his Grandmother and Grandfather moved from somewhere in Germany to the middle of the Midwest and obtained lots of fertile farmland. Their original house was a sod hut and was located where the grainery used to stand. Times were not easy and his grandmother burned all of the photos they had. I am certain there was a lot depression, isolation, and heavy demands on everyone.

The house on their land has become a beautiful old farmhouse with additions, deletions, and moderate changes. Their home was the first country home to have electricity in Barnes County. Growing up, my husband did not have running water in the house until he was in 5th grade (he is currently 51 years old). They had a big tin bath and lined up (not literally). I would imagine that the dirtiest, probably my husband, would get the last bath. Diapers were boiled, a porta-potty (bucket w/Lysol) was set up in the basement during the winter, and gardening/farming were a necessity. The outhouse still exists on their property, and actually my daughter had a graduation proof taken by it because it has so much character though it is not functional.

When I go to the farm it is a retreat, despite the blood, sweat, and tears that went into developing it. Of course when my mother in law was in the thick of raising her six children and working at the local clothing store their farmstead didn't have the aesthetics it has now. The flower gardens were probably more functional vegetable patches, I know the yard, porches, and structures have changed, but you should see it now. A little piece of heaven... or "God's Country" as my husband proudly states.

Looking at the shelf, I think about all of the "Stack" family members who turned the knob to enter or exit where ever the door led to. None of them had the vision of what the "Stack" clan would look like now, whether the farmstead would continue to exist in the family name, or what joy the farm would bring to their descendants. What a gift... Something from the heart of North Dakota that our children are already putting dibs on "when you die." I suspect that is one of the greatest compliments of all for a grandparent to get. Who would have thought a common item, a vision, a little elbow grease and a lot of love could provide such pleasure - Thank you so much!

2009-07-13T08:49:00.000-07:00

Seriously Folks,

As I sit and twit I am fairly certain I am neglecting some other duties around the house that need my attention. I try to figure out what brain chemical is being released through Twitter. It could definitely become an addiction. For me, it's not so much the rush of having new followers but there is something about getting responses from others. Does that mean that I am disappointed when no one responds? Well, no... but sometimes I do hope for an LOL. Fortunately, I have a sense of humor that makes me laugh even if the rest of the world doesn't get it. Maybe it's me... maybe it's you, it doesn't really matter.

I joined twitter thinking I wouldn't care much for it; however, I have connected with people around the globe and had conversations with folks I would have never had the opportunity to get to know. Global... that's the crux! My Australian follows are awesome, my follows to the north in Canada keep me coming back, England, Iraq, and a multitude of other places intrigue me every day. What an opportunity! I have connected with authors and purchased books for my job, I have found web pages and tools I never knew existed, and will continue learning every day from my new twitter friends/followers. I do need to figure out the balance of time I can allow each day though because, as I said before, I could be addicted to this method of communicating with the world. Help me out! Let me know if I am sharing too much or info the rest of the world can do without.

Updating is sometimes the challenge for me because I want you all to know I am checking and reading; however, I don't always have something to say. I have used some boring feeds like: "time to eat" or "going to work out". The going to work out actually pushes me to get up and go. I don't seem to have too much trouble getting up and getting something to eat so I will refrain from such trivial updates in the future.

My soul mate has been gone for a few weeks and is returning today. He is not fond of me Twittering and talking to strangers. I will encourage him to not knock it until he has tried it but will have to make sure I am not neglecting his emotional needs when he is around. He's more of a Facebook guy so maybe we can update our preferred sites at a time when we are not in need of one another's attention. Actually my kids (15,17, & 19) are a bit uncomfortable with me Twittering as well. Not sure why... maybe because of all of the "stranger danger" they have been trained on.

Maybe this is a phase, maybe it will last into my 90's - no one knows. I think of how we thought E-Mail was going to take over the communication world - it has, but now there are easier methods. Each method seems to have it's place in our lives we just have to figure out how we will incorporate it in to serve a purpose, fulfill a need, and communicate w/those who we are compelled to share our thoughts with.

See you on Twitter and hope you are having a wonderful day.

Summer Friends

2009-07-12T20:14:00.000-07:00

2009-04-19T18:37:00.000-07:00

So... the question is... how many people are interested in the life and times of me? I suspect I am way more into my life than anyone else would be but who knows. I am middle aged, middle classed, and have a softer middle than I would like. Consistency is good. I guess this is a start to a whole new hobby for me. Writing has been a passion for years. All of the ideas spinning in my head in the middle of the night. I also spin when I am driving my mid(dle) size car (hopefully not down the middle of the road) to work 55 miles each way every day. I can now start to develop my thoughts and hopefully this processing will give me some of the skills and confidence to take it to the next level... from the middle to the top!
Time will tell.
btw - Middle is a very funny word in isolation.